As some of you may know, I’ve had to postpone my trip back to good old Ann Arbor due to some unforeseen obstacles. Fret not, friends and hipsters, I will be back this January! Save me a beer.
Many people have asked what I’ve been doing these past few months to prepare myself for my junior year at college. To help explain I have compiled a list of several things I’ve done to pass the time in case you’re one of the nosy bastards who feels the need to keep tabs on me at all times, Jessica.
1. Hanging out with my niece and nephew.
2. Writing prompts.
3. Independently studying the Dutch language.
4. Getting heartburn.
5. Trying to make a Dark Souls character look exactly like Darth Maul.
6. Perfecting my Estuary English dialect.
7. Air drumming.
8. Looking up cute pictures of Slow Lorises.
9. Visiting petting zoos.
10. Writing bits and pieces of my three screenplays.
11. Studying serial killers.
12. Dodging bill collectors.
14. Being superstitious.
15. Being clever.
16. Writing this:
17. Reading all the books on my shelf.
18. Wishing I never sold my custom computer.
19. Wishing I never sold my DSLR.
20. Trying to overcome my fear of birds.
21. Failing to overcome my fear of birds.
22. Going on a Criminal Minds binge.
23. Missing Breaking Bad.
24. Trying to memorize all the words to “Rap God.”
25. Annoying people on Snapchat.
28. Changing my phone number.
29. Listening to this song:
30. Winning caption contests.
31. Talking to women on Tinder.
32. Feeling inadequate.
33. Wondering who would win in a fight between Warwick Davis and Peter Dinklage.
34. Putting money on Dinklage.
35. Being a curmudgeonly young adult.
36. Researching how to be an intern for Conan O’Brien.
37. Laughing at Nathan For You.
38. Having a sweet idea for a restaurant:
39. Hitting the online dating scene:
40. Wondering what I’d look like if I were skinny.
41. Trying to stay sane.
42. Finding this absolutely hilarious:
43. Re-learning Spanish.
44. Being nostalgic.
45. Teaching myself how to cook.
46. Burning food.
47. Teaching kids how to properly swear.
48. Definitely not stalking my high school crush.
49. Poking fun at Apple products.
50. Being attacked by people offended by Apple jokes.
51. Trying way too hard to come up with a list of 51 random things.
OK, that’s all for now. Take care. Or don’t. S’up to you.